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title: About
canonical: "https://royalty.nl/suggestion-of-shared-values/"
pubDate: "2021-07-25T09:28:37+00:00"
description: My name is Roy van Veen (1970). I am interested in what people drives. I analyse and write. I’m a (theater)photographer and playwright. And I produce theater that encourages new perspectives. The suggestion of shared values We live in a fast-paced world where we like to work with labels and boxes.
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My name is Roy van Veen (1970). I am interested in what people drives. I analyse and write. I’m a (theater)photographer and playwright. And I produce theater that encourages new perspectives. The suggestion of shared values We live in a fast-paced world where we like to work with labels and boxes. This makes it easy to quickly determine whether someone is interesting to you or not. Whether someone is in your bubble or not. And whether they fit into a certain curve or not. People are sorted and selected. Judgments are made automatically. And, by extension, condemnation follows as soon as someone reacts or acts differently. It is a short-sightedness that I have little use for and will always oppose. We share an experience equally with other people, but interpret it individually based on our background, upbringing, and sensory information. We expect responses from the people we talk to based on how we see them and on how we experience the world. This suggests shared values, but that is not the case. The other person sees themselves differently and experiences the environment differently. Failure to deal with this difference consciously leads to polarisation, antisemitism, homophobia, racism, and xenophobia. Cultural hotchpot I was born in 1970 and spent my youth mostly in my parents’ greengrocery, which was located in a multicultural working-class neighbourhood in Utrecht, The Netherlands. People of every walk of life visited that shop: from the sexton from the church across the street to truck drivers and prostitutes. We had musical talent in the shop, as well as local heroes like football-player Willem van Hanegem and Comedian Herman Berkien. And all those people from many different cultures surrounding our shop. I would regularly deliver groceries on foot in the neighboorhood and by car (mom driving) to people in trailer parks. I was a frequent visitor to kitchens of people originating from Rumania, Hungary, Spain, Turkey, Greece, Suriname and Indonesië (former Dutch Indies). As young kid I walked into those houses with bags and boxes full of peppers, garlic, and all kinds of unusual fruit, and there I discovered the most delicious smells. And I was always allowed to taste. In dealing with people from diverse cultural and social backgrounds as a young person, I really learned a lot. Magical playground Several times a week, my parents drove to the vegetable auction, and to growers and harbours to buy fruit and vegetables. There too, we encountered people of all backgrounds and walks of life: porters, laborers, traders, wholesalers, growers, sellers, farmers and so on. Especially at the auction, it was a cacophony of noise. The clatter of carts, machines, boats, and crates filled the large halls. And the auctioneers and porters trying to rise above it all without amplification (often using strong language). And everyone had a nickname. Most of those names would not be allowed today, believe me. Sometimes I ran small errands, other times I just sat on a huge stack of wooden crates looking down at the organised chaos on the floor below. There was auctioning and bidding in the corners (and a huge auction upstairs), with rows of carts full of produce waiting to be sold. On a short end you found the big trucks and boats of the sellers. The smaller vans of the buyers were on one of the long sides. And thousands of guys in blue overcoats moved the produce in carts from place to place. Ad hoc there was dealing and hustling between buyers who had bought to much, or traders that needed to get rid of over-production. Or people trying to sell stuff outside of “the system”. Here and there I saw people drinking coffee from a thermos (or booze from small bottles) or eating a quick lunch. Enjoying the chaos from above was great, but the 8 year old me found running errands pure magic. Yet it could be quite intimidating. It was like one of those old computergames where you are running against a clock, while trying to avoid all kinds of moving obstacles. Carts coming from every direction, with people yelling and cursing. And when you survived the mess and reached the row of traders, you had to find the guy you needed. You had never seen him and all you knew about him was from the assignment: “Roy, pick up my strawberries from Blue Joe over there.” Most people were wearing a blue coat, but which one was Joe? In the end I learned that it was not about the coat, but about the blue nose Joe had from all the alcohol he consumed. And I was “the little kid from the red one” (“de kleine van de rooie” like we say in Holland), as my dad had a big head of red hair. Two full days to Salzburg I didn’t become a shopkeeper myself, but founded companies in physical security (systems, guys and dogs), e-commerce (building webshops), workflow-management, telecoms and payment-services. Some of my companies had activities (and offices) in various countries meaning I spent a lot of time abroad. My pen and camera were my mental outlet. I wrote newsletters for my own companies and under pseudonyms short (travel) stories/columns for magazines. The rat-race was sustainable as my wife Ksenia really understands what makes me tick. We moved in together almost right after we met. And got married as soon as we fixed the papers. That was not easy, as she was born in a country that doesn’t exist anymore. We lived for our companies, experiencing all ups and downs together, but in a different role. My activities as CEO were always very visible, where she was backstage programming, optimising databases and running technical projects/teams. When she accompanied me on formal events, she was often addressed as “the wife of”. After over three years of continuous work, we took our first vacation: it was December 2002 and we went two full days to Salzburg. Heart and soul over head Ksenia was pregnant and not by accident. It was 2010. We approached it like any other project and had prepared and researched everything. She literally worked ’till her membranes broke, trying to make every last deadline. In September she delivered a healthy baby-girl. The process of giving birth (Ksenia did all the work) was a life-changing moment for me. It made me realise how single-sided the corporate rat-race actually was. You can pick a different line of business, but the challenge is always the same. The newborn brought a complete reset of values as tt made me realise that I had drifted far from my inner-self. Every company I started began with an innovative idea. During the early face I operated as a jack of all trades, touching all aspects of the product. I absolutely love that early face of tinkering and pioneering. Then the companies growths. Still cool as it brings new challenges, while I remain deeply involved in product development and the creative process. And then it gets bigger, meaning more and more of my attention is needed on other aspects: legal matters, HR-situations, permits, government regulations, (international) office challenges and more. To compensate for that big chuck of “less interesting” work, I added the creative side-job. It relieved emotional stress, but put a lot of stress on my personal life as I basically was mixing three jobs and a family. I chose to make some changes and to focus more on family and creative work. It wasn’t easy and it took the better part of a year to make the tough decisions needed. In the winter of 2014 I said goodbye to the hectic life based on head to focus on heart and soul. The husband … These days I write a lot (short stories, scripts for movie and theater), produce theatershows and tinker on an interesting piece of software. And I act as a backstage photographer. Occasionally I lecture on entrepreneurship, startups or teambuilding. And Ksenia? We are still together! She discovered acting while playing with our daughter and took up acting-lessons. Drive and dedication can bring any human being far. Sometimes she plays ensembles, but she mostly makes soloshows which she performs over 40 times per year. As she frequently is on TV and Radio she is making quite a name for herself. Most theaters welcome me as ‘the husband of’.